An Imaginative Mind, or an Extreme Case of OCD

My current job requires me to do things which are, how should I say...less than fun?

Perhaps that is an under/over-statement. You decide: I arrange things on shelves to make them look more presentable to the public, while fooling them into thinking we have more product than we actually do. Some shifts require that I do this for eight hours. This is the kind of job where it's necessary to have an imaginitive mind (or an extreme case of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder) for one to leave at the end of their shift without being gripped by hysteria.

A quick recap about the job (not that it's necessary): I arrange things on shelves. Easy enough, right? Exactly! It's so easy that I finish the job in 3-4 hours, and am left with about half of my shift to make it look like I'm working.

Now, for the few hours of real work that I do, it's easy to tell that I'm doing what I'm supposed to. I move up and down the aisle looking for product that's out of place and I return the stray merchandise to it's rightful position. There's nothing that can escape my clutches when I'm conditioning the shelves. Managers walk past, and say "Hey Eric, how's it going?" To which I always reply, "Oh, pretty good." *shuffle* *arrange* *shuffle* I'm in the zone.

When I finish my initial round of the store, though, I'm left with hours to pursue other objectives. At this stage in my shift, I make frequent trips to: the breakroom, the bathroom, the photo-lab, and other areas of the store where I find products that interest me. Most of all, however, I'm given the opportunity to do what I do best. Think. The deep thought and reflection I achieve during this phase of work is comparable only to that point where you're just about to fall asleep and EVERYTHING makes perfect sense. You can tell I'm deep in thought when I'm moving randomly through aisles without any apparent destination. I may also be sitting down on the floor, removing objects from the shelf, putting them back on, and repeating this process. I usually do this until I feel that someone's on to me. Once I feel the managers are peering down on my progress from the security cameras, I get up, move down the aisle a bit, and continue the process. Paranoia, or instinct? I'm not sure, but it works.

I suppose the most notable period of thought was when I devised the skeleton for my new calendar system. I'm still working on it, but I will post it when it's complete. I'll just say that it's highly efficient when compared to the hackneyed system currently in place. I'm still working out some kinks because the original model required that I completetly modify linear metric measurement.

How did I go from keeping track of days, to affecting the length of measurements in the metric system?

Well, because the meter is a set length which was determined by the distance light travels in a certain amount of time, and since this entire model is out to restructure time, I would have to restructure the metric system. Or just modify the amount of time required for light to travel that specific distance, given my new model for time. Not sure yet, but I'll do my best to make my thoughts coherent when I post the complete model.

But, yeah, that's what I do at work.